Cannes Cannes

May 20, 2008 at 9:00 pm (Draped, Necklace, Salma Hayek, Sashes) ()

Cannes provides us lots of runway fodder. Night after night of red carpets, parties, and evening wear. Somehow, people think that they will look great simply because they are in France. Like being fashionable is in the water.

Salma Hayek seems to be confused on how to dress her post-baby body. I understand that. Her normally generous bust is now gargantuan. Perhaps her middle section still needs some work. Honey, we feel your pain. Welcome to the world of us regular mortals.

But do not — I repeat do not! — think that a roomier midsection and a low-slung sash is going to help you out. You are busty. Any dress that makes your mid section look as wide as your chest is NOT going to look good.

I also don’t care for the details on this dress. The military-like gold epaulets on the shoulders don’t go with the flowy dress. The loop-as-sleeve thing just seems weird. The bordello beading on the end of the sash drags the sash down, so it hangs just under the tummy paunch. Never an area we want to highlight.

Just try a little cleavage, a nipped waist, and a smile. It’ll work wonders!

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