Let them eat cake
Jennifer Lopez makes me want to poke my eyeballs out slowly and painfully. She is insane. Over-the-top, let-them-eat-cake, my-foot-hurts-so-I-can’t-keep-my-Project-Runway-commitment, holier-than-thou, isn’t-my-ferret-of-a-husband-fabulous insane. She makes Victoria Beckham seem humble.
I like everything about this Marchesa dress except for the marabou boobs. It’s like Santa’s elves mated with the ice princess to generate Elizabeth Taylor’s mini-me. She definitely ain’t Jenny on the Block no more.
The visible tan lines make it even worse–how do tan lines and fur in the same outfit make sense?
Hypnotized, mezmerized
I’m feeling very sleepy…I’m feeelliing verry sleeepppy…I’m feeeelllllliinnnngg verrrry sleeeeeppppppyyy.
I think I’m being hypnotized by Kate Beckinsale’s Prada dress. My head is spinning and my eyes are swirling.
Is it a good thing that this dress puts me into a trance? Is it a good thing to look like a coral reef? Is the dress even particularly flattering to her body?
I’m not sure. All I know is that when she snaps her fingers I’ll wake up refreshed. Maybe I’ll even have quit smoking!
Springtime down under
Nicole Kidman so rarely missteps, so this outfit is extra surprising.
I know it is springtime in Australia, but is it a good idea to celebrate with a floral dress with a contrasting front, purple tights, a bowler hat and Grandpa’s sweater vest?
