Posing 101

September 18, 2008 at 10:31 am (All Black, Renee Zellweger, Ruffles, Strapless) (, , , , , , )

Is Renee Zellweger ill? Does she have a gastrointestinal issue that she is working through? Did she have some bad sushi in the limo? Why else would she be contorting herself so oddly on the red carpet?

It’s as though her arms are disjointed from the rest of her body. She doesn’t seem to know what to do with those odd, floppy, ungainly appendages, and heaven forbid she just leave them casually at her side. So instead she hugs herself, practices guitar cords with her left hand, and plays itsy-bitsy spider on her right thigh.

 

For heaven sakes, Renee. You’ve been to God-knows-how-many-red-carpet-events-always-wearing-Carolina-Herrera? You should know how to do this a little better. Stand up straight. Put one leg slightly in front of the other. Turn your shoulder a bit. Pull your head forward and tilt your chin down slightly. And smile. That’s it. That’s *all* you have to do. You do not have to contort yourself like a Cirque du Soleil wannabe.

 

P.S. And lay off the Botox a bit.

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