Props

March 10, 2009 at 9:56 am (Asymmetrical, Boots, Cardigan, Diane Kruger, Fur, Metallic, Ruffles, Shiny, Tights) (, , , , , , )

I guess you gotta give Diane Kruger some props for trying. She tries very hard. And she is usually soooo close.

But, as they say, close only counts in horseshoes.  Certainly not in fashion.

The Roberto Cavallichain link dress seems a little frumpy figure skater. And I don’t get the fur shrug with dress. Put it on a tailored Dita von Teese or Victoria Beckham look and I get it. But with an edgy dress and trash sack booties? Nuh-uh.

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Hit me with your best shot

February 5, 2009 at 4:28 pm (All Black, Beaded, Boots, Leggings, Sequins, Sheer, Stripes, Sweater, Tank, Taylor Momsen) (, , , , , , )

I am utterly and completely over Taylor Momsen’s Pat Benatar look.  Those leggings are really unfortunate.

Plus, I get totally annoyed every time I see her photo. She’s 15 and newly famous. Why does she always look so pissed off about being photographed?

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Multiple personalities

January 30, 2009 at 12:32 pm (All Black, Boots, Denim, Rumer Willis) (, , , , , , )

I think Rumer Willis might suffer from a multiple personality disorder.

Sometimes she dresses like a sexpot. Sometimes she dresses like a guy. In this photo, she dresses like she grabbed whatever was laying around on the floor.

I’m not sure that these clothes are even clean. Or that she combed her hair. I sure as heck hope she at least brushed her teeth!

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Mad plaid

November 24, 2008 at 8:11 pm (Boots, Cardigan, Draped, Katie Holmes, Plaid, Ruffles, Suri Cruise) (, , , , , , )

I really thought/hoped/dreamed/prayed we were past the full length tartan plaid look. Sure, I get that the kid likes to wear dresses and refuses to wear pants. Does that mean that mom has to wear a big, full, ruffled, shapeless dress too? Suri’s dress and cardigan are way cuter than this ensemble.

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Lethal

November 24, 2008 at 12:09 pm (All Black, Boots, Deep V, Halter, Leather, Leggings, Metallic, Rihanna, Shiny, Strapless, Studded) (, , , , , , )

Rihanna: is this fashion or a deadly weapon? It makes a great AMA stage costume, but I’m honestly a little frightened by it. Very Pamela Anderson/ Barb Wire, Bridgette Nielsen, or “Letha” Stella from Project Runway. And we know how classy they all are.

PS I do not like your hair as of late. Please rethink the short bouffant look!

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Vogue

November 11, 2008 at 3:32 pm (All Black, Anna Wintour, Beaded, Boots, Necklace) (, , , , , , )

So maybe it’s a bad idea to question the fashion judgement of Anna Wintour. Who am I anyways? But I really don’t like this Prada dress. I’ll throw caution to the wind becuase the dress ain’t pretty. It. Just. Isn’t. Pretty. It’s drab and depressing and it kinda looks like her shoulders are molding.

She also looks like the icon for the ladies restroom.

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Peek-a-boo

November 5, 2008 at 3:26 pm (Boots, Gwyneth Paltrow, Lace, Lingerie, Necklace) (, , , , , , )

Is Gwyneth Paltow’s Antonio Berardi dress supposed to be sultry? Alluring? Cuz I just don’t see it.

Instead, I see a phallic crotch cover, granny undergarments, and shoes with built in footies.

I wonder if the boots have little white pom poms on the back of her ankles?

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Xena

October 11, 2008 at 11:26 am (Belt, Boots, Kelly Lynch, Plaid, Studded, Tights) (, , , , , , )

Kelly Lynch seems to be channelling Xena the Scottish Warrior Princess here. Why else would she pair Larry the Cable Guy’s plaid shirt with some butt-kickin’ boots and a studded purse? I don’t know if the look is Scottish, western, biker, or warrior. But I know it’s bad.

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Superhero

September 29, 2008 at 10:24 am (Backless, Boots, Katie Holmes, Leggings, Shiny) (, , , , , , )

Victoria Beckham must be going for the Superhero of Fashion look. Perhaps she is able to leap tall buildings in a single bound? Or she will save Gotham City from from the perils of blah fashion?

I’ll say this for Ms. Beckham– she always creates a sensation. For the launch of the Beckham’s new fragrance, she sported Antonio Berardi from head to toe (but not heel).

The dress is lovely and very sculptural. I liked it better at it’s original runway length (which was a few inches longer, but still well above the knee). Her mega-shortened skirt lost most of the interesting detail along the thigh. But a beautiful dress.

It’s the rubberized-leggings-that-become-heelless-platform-boots that are…aahh…noteworthy. They certainly aren’t for everyone. If anyone can pull them off, i would be Victoria Beckham. I like that they push the boundary of what is expected. But when does pushing boundaries just become absurd? Absurd, as in “I can’t really walk or stand in these” absurd? I mean, really? Come on.

I can’t wait until her BFF Katie Holmes buys these to wear with her pegged baggy jeans.

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Oy Vay O’Day

September 12, 2008 at 1:02 pm (Aubrey O'Day, Boots, Cut-outs, Sequins, Stripes) (, , , , , , )

We know Aubrey O’Day has high needs for attention. She’ll do whatever it takes to get her picture taken. Imagine her and Bai Ling and Phoebe Price stranded together on an island with no photographers. Heaven.

We hate to give her the attention she craves by posting her fashion choices. So let’s not focus on her. Instead, what compelled Giuseppe Zanotti to make these crazy peep toe shoe boots? Perhaps he was inspired by his dog’s neck cone? Maybe she is joining a stiletto soccer game and needs couture shin guards?

I like the version on his website, without the extended calf cuff. This version feels like an exaggerated ankle strap, but is still within the realm of reason.

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