Beat it

November 6, 2008 at 2:58 pm (All Black, Beyonce, Gloves) (, , , , , , )

Beyonce is going through a lot to conceal her wedding ring. Or she is channeling her inner Michael Jackson. Either way, I don’t get this armadillo glove.

At least her Gareth Pugh dress looks better than the white version.

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Pixie Chick

September 19, 2008 at 10:02 am (Gloves, Necklace, Sarah Jessica Parker, Stretch) (, , , , , , , )

I don’t *hate* Sarah Jessica Parker’s look for the DVD launch of Sex and the City. I just don’t particularly love it.

The Alexander McQueen dress is OK, albeit a little too tight. It’s blah. Whatever. Pass me another Cosmopolitan. I don’t really *get* the wispy thingies on the front– is it smoke? Cotton puffs? Cobwebs? Don’t know and, honestly, don’t even really care.

Shoes are fine, but little boring. Guess I hoped for a little more. I do NOT like the gloves. At all. They look like knee highs. And I don’t like that they are gathered/bunched/puckered randomly along her forearms.

Most of all, I don’t like her hair. The short pixie bangs only elongate her already long face. And the difference in coloring makes it look like she glued a┬átoupee (or a small rodent) to her forehead.

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Spiderwoman

June 17, 2008 at 11:29 am (Costume, Draped, Gloves, Kylie Minogue, Sheer) (, )

Stage costumes can be held to slightly different standards that red carpet fashion. Nonetheless, that is the deal with this costume on Kylie Minogue? There is no where (on this planet, at least) that this dress is fashionable. In fact, none of the separate elements are even fashionable. Unless you are the drag queen captain of Battlestar Galactica.

Let’s look first at the flesh colored leotard under the dress. Unless you are figure skater and don’t want to flash the cameras during your triple-salchow-into-a-double-lutz combo, you shouldn’t wear an outfit that needs–much less shows–a flesh colored leotard.

Then we have the sheer, diaphanous skirt which evokes a bad I Dream of Genie memory. Topped of by the odd ribbon pattern on her chest. Is it meant to accentuate her sternum? Highlight her rib cage? Be a purple map for open heart surgery? And the best accessory for this look? Why, opera length gold gloves, of course!

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