April 6, 2009 at 1:32 pm (All Black, Backless, Mock Turtleneck, Nicole Kidman, Sequins) (, , , , , )

Nicole Kidman has been disappointing me with her consistent L’Wren Scott wardrobe. Soooo snoozy. Really. Is there anything remotely interesting, fresh, or unusual about this dress?

Wake me up when she starts wearing Chanel again.

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October 2, 2008 at 5:48 pm (Belt, Kenley Collins, Mock Turtleneck, Project Runway) (, , , , , , , , )

Kenley Collins really should have been auf’d last night on Project Runway. Isn’t it a *basic tenet* of reality TV that someone has to go home? Now, I gave them a pass last season because the bottom two (Chris and Rami) were neck-and-neck. But I was very disappointed this time around. Someone should have been auf’d. And I think that should have been Kenley.

Sure, Korto didn’t have her best showing last night. And none of them knocked it out of the park. But Kenley’s boring mock-neck-racer-back-scaly-fish number really should have sent her home. The only good thing about it was that she removed the fish-scale sleeves.

Add her attitude (“I wasn’t going for elegant, Heidi.”) and I’d say auf wiedersehen.

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Victorian horsey

September 25, 2008 at 4:59 pm (Belt, Eva Herzigova, Lace, Mock Turtleneck) (, , , , , , )

I get the look of Eva Herzigova’s Dolce & Gabbana dress. And I don’t hate it. But I also don’t love it. And I really don’t love the bright red lipstick.

The dress feels like Queen Victoria dressed in Ralph Lauren. It also feels a little heavy-handed, with the lace and the darting and the gathers and the high neck and the long sleeves and the scalloped edges.

Closer inspection of the fabric is also confusing. At first, I thought it was a lace overlay, a la Prada. But close up it seems that it is printed on the fabric. I dunno. I’m just so confused.

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Call 911

September 2, 2008 at 11:43 am (Mock Turtleneck, Scarf, Sharon Stone) (, , , , , )

Is Sharon Stone unwell? Has she consumed an illegal drug? In a lethargic stupor from too much turkey? Exhausted from singlehandedly curing AIDS? Should someone call a doctor? 911?

She has taken style cues from Matthew McConaughey and wrapped a bubblicious rainbow scarf around her bedraggled head. Apparently, whatever is ailing Ms. Stone prevents her from combing her hair or washing her face. And it gives her the chills so she has to wear a ribbed turtleneck sweater in Malibu.

I am worried she is suffering from multiple personality. Where is the “I-OWN-this-red-carpet” Sharon Stone who can show up even Elton John in outrageousness? Bring her back! We love to mock and ridicule *that* Sharon Stone. It is so unrewarding to mock and ridicule this Sharon Stone.

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Will o’ the wisp

July 2, 2008 at 9:42 am (Cynthia Nixon, Maxi-dress, Metallic, Mock Turtleneck) (, , , , )

I am not a fan of mock turtlenecks. I am not a fan of wearing a color that is the same as your skin tone, especially if you run on the pale side. I am not a fan of split-end fly-away hair styles. Ergo, I am not a fan of Cynthia Nixon’s look at the Tommy Hilfiger 10th anniversary party.

(At least she looked better than Hugh Jackman and his wife! WTF? This ain’t no backyard barbecue!)

It’s not a big surprise that I didn’t like this look, as I am not a fan of Tommy Hilfiger. I think of him a Ralph Lauren wannabe, but his clothes aren’t nearly as ingenious, stylish or visionary.

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