Slip up

October 14, 2008 at 11:26 am (Asymmetrical, Beaded, Clutch, Draped, Rachel Weisz, Shiny) (, , , , , , , )

Normally I love Rachel Weisz. She always looks classic and elegant, but with a little sultry twist.

I was a bit disappointed in this Narciso Rodriguez dress. I don’t hate it, but the top seems incongruous withe the bottom.

The top says LBD with the tight beaded bodice and a slight bondage/choking vibe. Then the bottom has a wispy ethereal quality that doesn’t make sense with the top.

Finally, the wisp of slip at her thigh just makes me think of my grandmother saying, “Do you think she knows her slip is showing?”

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Milla, part deux

October 2, 2008 at 10:43 am (Leggings, Milla Jovovich, Necklace, Shiny, T-Shirt) (, , , , , , , )

Mes amies, I am not in love with Milla Jovovich’s outfit at the Givenchy runway show. To quote our beloved Project Runway judges, it feels very cliche.

It seems Milla is channeling the Olson twins or Lilo. Same old rubberized leggings/slouchy tee/Heidi hairdo combination. Yada, yada, yada. Been there, done that. A million times before.

(On a final note, though, I really do like the jacket.)

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September 29, 2008 at 10:24 am (Backless, Boots, Katie Holmes, Leggings, Shiny) (, , , , , , )

Victoria Beckham must be going for the Superhero of Fashion look. Perhaps she is able to leap tall buildings in a single bound? Or she will save Gotham City from from the perils of blah fashion?

I’ll say this for Ms. Beckham– she always creates a sensation. For the launch of the Beckham’s new fragrance, she sported Antonio Berardi from head to toe (but not heel).

The dress is lovely and very sculptural. I liked it better at it’s original runway length (which was a few inches longer, but still well above the knee). Her mega-shortened skirt lost most of the interesting detail along the thigh. But a beautiful dress.

It’s the rubberized-leggings-that-become-heelless-platform-boots that are…aahh…noteworthy. They certainly aren’t for everyone. If anyone can pull them off, i would be Victoria Beckham. I like that they push the boundary of what is expected. But when does pushing boundaries just become absurd? Absurd, as in “I can’t really walk or stand in these” absurd? I mean, really? Come on.

I can’t wait until her BFF Katie Holmes buys these to wear with her pegged baggy jeans.

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September 26, 2008 at 11:00 am (Deep V, Ruffles, Sheer, Shiny, Traci Bingham) (, , , , , , )

Wow. I am utterly speechless. There just aren’t words for Traci Bingham’s outfit.

PS Here is classy personified. The ruffles are detachable.

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Opera fan

September 23, 2008 at 9:56 am (Bows, Draped, Necklace, Parker Posey, Shiny) (, , , , , , )

Does anyone really like opera? I would be shocked if 1% of the western world actually liked opera. But perhaps I am just not cultured enough.

The best and brightest showed up for last night’s 125th Opening Night Gala of the Metropolitan Opera photo op. And knock me silly, 15 year-old Taylor Momsen is an opera fan! (Unless she had it confused with a Jonas Brothers concert?)

Anyhoo, Parker Posey showed up looking like the love child between Rumer Willis and Little Bo Peep. The Zac Posen dress is a blousey, flowy, bowey, pastel mess. And the cotton ball tote really pushes it past any legal limits of cuteness.

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Emmy let down

September 22, 2008 at 10:01 am (All Black, All White, America Ferrara, Christina DeRosa, Clutch, Costume, Draped, Necklace, Ruffles, Shiny) (, , , , , , , , )

We have two examples on the Emmy red carpet don’t list today.

First, America Ferrara normally is on our A list, and she simply faltered this time around. I love her in color with a fitted silhouette. Why she deviated from that magic formula, I’m not sure. But I am real sure that it didn’t look good.

The vintage Werle dress is too voluminous for her, especially with the ruching. The heavy necklace, dark color, and long hair just weighed her down more. We look forward to a better attempt next time, America. Remember that color and fun are your friends!

Christina DeRosa, on the other hand, falters regularly. I think she confuses the red carpet with a Halloween party, and loves to make every look into a costume. If she can show off the girls in the process, even better!

This is just a bad senorita stereotype all around. From the ridiculous fan color to the clutch purse to the tacky platform shoes. Worst off all, the look says cheap, cheap, cheap. Ugh. There aren’t even words.

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Being kind

September 17, 2008 at 1:13 pm (Belt, Buttons, Clutch, Jumpsuit, Shiny, Shorts) (, , , , , , )

A posting described this Stella McCartney outfit as a “romper.” I think that is being kind. Unless “romper” is the new code word for a wrinkled-parachute-buttoned-up-shapeless-colorless-shorts-outfit-with-pockets-slapped-on-the thighs. If so, then I completely agree! Spot-on description.

Can I say that I am really tired of Kate Hudson? I am not passionate enough about her to spout off in an emotionally-charged fashion (like I did about JLo on Monday). But I’ve had enough of the spunkiness, the goofiness, the isn’t-it-weird-how-I’m-my-mother’s-identical-clone-ness, the I-kissed-another-boy-while-playing-tennis-because-I-don’t-believe-in-monogamy-ness, and the my-son-really-WANTS-his-hair-to-be-this-long-ness.

And mostly, I’m just tired that every single movie she is in seems EXACTLY the same. Tell me *how* exactly Fool’s Gold differed from Raising Helen differed from How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days? Cuz I swear she was playing the exact same role in each and every one of those movies.

Oh, wait. I guess I am passionate enough to spout off in an emotionally-charged fashion.

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Even if

September 10, 2008 at 9:47 am (Kelly Osbourne, Lace, Ruffles, Shiny, Strapless) (, , , , , , )

Even if I concede that quirky fashions are allowed at a Betsey Johnson show, this dress is bad.

Even if I concede that Kelly Osbourne is looking pretty good these days, this dress is bad.

Even if I concede that Betsey Johnson’s models were wearing garish confectionery wigs, and am grateful that Kelly didn’t follow suit, this dress is bad.

Even if I look past the white shoes and sunglasses, this dress is bad.

I guess this dress is just bad.

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Top fashion insiders

August 27, 2008 at 2:14 pm (Shiny, Strapless, Vanessa Minillo) (, , , , , , )

I love the description for this odd event: “Top fashion insiders attend the launch of of the new Tide and Downy Total Care.” I am not 100% sure what a “Top Fashion Insider” is (do they get security clearance like a high-level Pentagon official?), but there would be a lot of pressure to fit that billing. Heaven forbid that the new Tide is launced by a B-grade Fashion Insider!?

Who did they get? Jamie-Lynn Sigler, Vanessa Minnillo, and Lindsay Price. Really? This is the best they can do for “Top Fashion Insiders?”

For the sake of argument, even IF we grant these three as “Top Fashion Insiders,” (which we certainly do NOT), then I’d expect to be blown away by their garb. I unequivocally was not blown away.

Vanessa Minillo looks like she is ready for the 1989 prom. Honestly, I think my good friend Heather wore this EXACT dress to our prom. I’m not exaggerating! She wore a shiny blue satin dress with a ruched front. She probably even wore plain black pumps from Bakers. And her hairstyle was similar, except she had permed hair and teased her bangs straight up in front.

Top Fashion Insider? I think not…

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Going for gold

August 25, 2008 at 9:56 am (Cut-outs, Deep V, Headband, Paris Hilton, Sequins, Shiny, Stretch) (, , , , , , )

Unless Paris Hilton is participating in an Olympic sport, there is no good excuse for this outfit. While our expectations from Ms. Hilton aren’t high in the first place, this get-up is truly ridiculous. It isn’t flattering, it isn’t functional, and sure as heck isn’t fashionable.

And just in case you didn’t know who she is, it was particularly kind of her to emblazon her name along her T, with a follow-up across her A.

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