Holy. Cow.

March 2, 2009 at 12:02 pm (Sheer, Stripes, Tilda Swinton) (, , , , , , )

Holy. Cow.

We expect the unexpected from Tilda Swinton. I actually enjoy it. But this Christian LaCroix is really something. And not anything good.

It’s not flattering. It’s not even particularly interesting, except to ponder why someone would ever design or wear this.

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Undergarments

January 30, 2009 at 3:07 pm (Belt, Hat, High Waisted, Leggings, Mischa Barton, Necklace, Scarf, Shiny, Suspenders, T-Shirt, Tank) (, , , , , , )

Now, this seems like a whole lotta look for just walking down the street (even if it is a street in Paris during Fashion week).

Each individual component is tolerable, but all together (hat, necklaces, tank/tee, suspenders, belt, bracelet, skirt, tights, purse, scarf, tights, shoes) with a big hair and dark eyeliner equals too much.

And Mischa….darling…let me introduce you to a bra. When you’re wearing something high-waisted, you really need to wear a bra.

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What a mess

December 8, 2008 at 12:53 pm (Hat, Hot Pants, Pamela Anderson, T-Shirt) (, , , , , , )

Pamela Anderson’s outfit is a complete and total mess.

Is it grunge? Is it a cover-up for a Flintstone-inspired bathing suit? Is it artsy? Is it quirky?

I say it is none of these. It’s just plain odd.

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Cry for help

October 8, 2008 at 2:54 pm (Aubrey O'Day, Brooch, Headband, Metallic, T-Shirt) (, , , , , , , )

This isn’t an outfit. This is a cry for help. And for hair dye.

I am sure the Obama campaign is very proud of this celebrity endorsement. It will help them secure the white trash skanky vote. Or perhaps she’ll do a lap dance for anyone in Ohio or Florida who will vote for Obama rather than McCain.

PS That poor dog. His t-shirt says “I bark 4 Obama.”

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Milla, part deux

October 2, 2008 at 10:43 am (Leggings, Milla Jovovich, Necklace, Shiny, T-Shirt) (, , , , , , , )

Mes amies, I am not in love with Milla Jovovich’s outfit at the Givenchy runway show. To quote our beloved Project Runway judges, it feels very cliche.

It seems Milla is channeling the Olson twins or Lilo. Same old rubberized leggings/slouchy tee/Heidi hairdo combination. Yada, yada, yada. Been there, done that. A million times before.

(On a final note, though, I really do like the jacket.)

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Politics in fashion

September 25, 2008 at 10:33 am (Kristina Apgar, Necklace, Polka Dots, Ruffles, T-Shirt, Tank) (, , , , , , )

Memo to Kristina Apgar:

A.) Not really sure who you are.
B.) Agree with your political choice.
C.) Strenuously object to your fashion choices.

It’s hard to be fashionable and political at the same time. If you insist on political apparel, I say try a simple fitted tee with some rockin’ jeans (a la Halle Berry, telling us to Barack the vote) and be done.

Do *not* attack a t-shirt with scissors to make a shapless tank, throw on a Minnie Mouse ruffled polka dot skirt, and add pumps and pearls. Barack deserves better than that. You certainly aren’t winning him any votes!

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Does that make me crazy? Possibly.

August 26, 2008 at 9:47 am (Beyonce, Boots, Denim, Draped, Feathers, Kim Kardashian, Necklace, Solange Knowles, T-Shirt) (, , , , , , , , , )

It must be hard to be Beyonce’s little sister. The lady is super-beautiful, super-talented, and (apparently) super-nice. She can sing, she can dance, she can act…she’s got it all.

Since Beyonce has taken all those superlatives for herself, it seems that Solange Knowles decided to go for the last descriptive left… crazy.

To her credit, Solange completely excels at crazy. The girl *owns* crazy. Hook, line and sinker. Case in point: her get up for last night’s Letterman appearance. Is she for real? A topshop feather bolero jacket? A ten-pound gold chain? And schizophrenic booties?

It is a sad day when Kim Kardashian shows up looking twenty times classier.

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House of Hanes

August 5, 2008 at 8:44 am (Gwyneth Paltrow, Shorts, T-Shirt) (, , , , , )

I am not seeing the design ingenuity in this Elizabeth and James outfit. Sure, it makes Gwyneth Paltrow look about 9 feet tall, with legs that never end. But I think her gene pool and her work out regimen have as much to do with that as anything.

The outfit is a glorified Hanes t-shirt and some short shorts. And I’m not sure the t-shirt is particularly flattering. It looks like Gwyneth rolled out of bed, pulled back her hair, grabbed some awesome Tod’s shoes, and hauled her butt down to Amagansett.

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